Understanding Miscarriage: Emotions
Miscarriage is the unplanned end of a pregnancy before the baby can live outside the womb. When a miscarriage happens, you’re likely to have a wide range of feelings. Allow yourself to accept how you feel. Only then can you begin to move on.
No One Is to Blame
Know that you did not cause this to happen. Miscarriage is very common. It occurs most often with a first pregnancy, but it can happen with any pregnancy. Miscarriage usually takes place during the first 10 weeks after conception.
Grief Takes Many Forms
Grief may be the first thing you feel, or it may come upon you later. Perhaps you’ll grieve because the future you hoped for is lost. Grief is painful and often lonely. But it should become easier to deal with over time.
What You Feel Is Okay
No one can tell you how to respond to your miscarriage. If you have been trying to have a child, this loss may feel overwhelming. Perhaps this was an unplanned pregnancy. That doesn’t mean you won’t feel loss. You know yourself best. It’s okay to feel whatever you feel.
A Sense of Loss
No matter what you thought about being pregnant, having a miscarriage may cause a sense of loss. You may feel as if something is missing. It’s okay if you can’t describe how you feel. At first, it may be enough just to look inside yourself and feel your emotions.
Men grieve too. You may be feeling sad, helpless or frustrated. When you’re struggling with your own feelings, knowing how to help your partner may be hard. But do your best to provide support. The following tips may also help:
Be kind to yourselves.
Spend time together.
Fix a meal or bring dinner home.
Rent a movie.
If you have children, spend extra time with them.